All I Want For Christmas

If musical ringtones are of the Devil, why are there always more of them around Christmas? Beautiful melodies that warm the heart when sung by Christmas carolers have an uncanny ability to inspire wrath and ire when spewing from the tinny speaker of a cellphone.

If I could make one Christmas wish, it would be that the whole world be instantly educated on cellphone etiquette. Namely, when and where it is appropriate for one's phone to ring out loud, and when it should be on silent or vibrate.

From The Rulebook, chapter 3, section 7:

At the office, your cellphone should not ring out loud unless absolutely necessary. When an audible ring is necessary, it should be a simple ring, never an obnoxious ringtone that disrupts the whole office. Obnoxious ringtones include but are not limited to:

• All I Want For Christmas is My Two Front Teeth
• Jingle Bells
• Hava Nagila
• The Entertainer (a.k.a. The Ice Cream Truck Song)
• That freakin' Monday Night Football fanfare (Dun dun dun duuuun! Dun dun dun dun duuuun!)

Thank you.

The Passage of Time

Some of you may have noticed that I haven't posted in a while. Well now I have. So there.